In this article from VKool.com, we introduce basic information about sexual performance anxiety and how to overcome sexual performance anxiety effectively. You will learn what causes this condition and natural ways to reignite your own sex life.
I. How To Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety – Main Causes
Sex is supposed to be a pleasurable experience, yet it is difficult to feel sexy or intimate with your partner if you have sexual performance anxiety. In fact, one of the greatest sexual as well as emotional obstacles for males recent days is performance anxiety. Those people with sexual performance anxiety constantly wonder “Am I doing it right?” or “Is her enjoying it?” and so on. Continual worry over your own appearance and performance in bed could make sex so stressful and also nerve-wracking. Even, it makes you want to avoid having sex.
In fact, sex is more than just a physical response. Really, arousal is strongly tied into the human emotions and feelings. When the mind of a person is too stressed out to concentrate on sex, his body will not be able to get excited either. There are a variety of causes that lead to sexual performance anxiety, which are:
- The feat that you will not or could not perform well in bed as well as satisfy your partner in terms of sexual feelings
- The difficulties available in your relationship
- The problems of your body image, containing concern over your current weight
- The worry of a man about his dick which will not “measure up”
- The concern of a man about ejaculating prematurely or even taking too long in order to reach orgasm
- The anxiety of a woman about not being able to reach an orgasm or enjoy sexual experience
Besides, there are also many other causes of performance anxiety, such as:
- Societal pressure: In reality, societal pressure is considered as one of the most popular causes of performance anxiety. A lot of men worry that their own ability to satisfy a woman impacts how they are seen by other people, by the public; while women worry that men are about to judge them for their own abilities or body image. This kind of pressure is exacerbated by the manner that people are so public with their life in recent days, usually worsening societal pressure.
- In experience: this will cause minor sexual dysfunctions, thereby leading to performance anxiety. For instance, premature ejaculation is rather common in those people who have very little or even no sexual experience. When it comes to sexual dysfunctions, the development of this can lead to the development of performance anxiety, thereby further worsening sexual problems.
- Upsetting sexual encounters: actually, sex is strongly prone to associations and expectations. Hence, those couples, who have ever had an argument, fight, or felt so embarrassed for any problem in the bedroom due to a partner, will be more likely to suffer from anxiety in upcoming sexual situations. We all know that people are sensitive about their abilities, especially sexual abilities, body and many more; and the things which might disrupt that sensitivity could result in anxiety.
For those who experience these worries, they will automatically cause their body to release a response named “fight or flight”. In addition, the stress hormones such as norepinephrine and epinephrine are naturally launched in a lot of reactions which were really designed to prepare the human body to confront a threat. Obviously, your partner is not and will not a threat – that means this response is very counterproductive to the intimacy.
On the other hand, sexual performance anxiety is also a side effect of several anxiety medications; and the anxiety over sexual performance seems to be much more popular in those people who have never made love before, usually due to the pressure they put on themselves to perform.
Recommend reading: complete sex guide for couples
II. How To Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety – Common Symptoms
In reality, the human state of mind could have a big impact on the ability of getting aroused. Even when you are with a person who you find really sexual appealing, worrying about whether you can please your partner might make it impossible for you to do that.
In males, it is said that one of the influences of stress hormones is constricting the blood vessels. The truth is, less blood flowing into the dick of a man could make it much more difficult for him to have an erection. Moreover, even for those men, who do not have any problem in getting excited could feel hard, even feel impossible to get an erection when they are suffering from sexual performance anxiety.
According to a prestigious study, sexual performance anxiety is often not diagnosed as often it occurs in men. Yet, it could still impact arousal in women. This could prevent a female from getting lubricated enough to enjoy sex, taking away the physical desire of making love.
Sexual performance anxiety could take both men and women out of the mind-set necessary to have sex. Once you are too focusing on whether or not you are performing well, you could not focus on what you are doing in bed with your partner, at the same time. And, a distracted lover is also an inattentive lover, making you feel like you even suffer more failures. Even when you can get aroused, you might be too distracted to gain orgasm.
What is more? Sexual performance anxiety also results in perpetual cycle and you will be sunk deeply into that vicious cycle.
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