Sex is known as a necessary spicy for love. If you want to maintain your relationship well, your sex life must grow and renew because you will get boring with sex if it is going on the same things in a year. Actually, there are many simple ways to connect your sex life and improve it that you may ignore or do not concern about. As a result, VKool.com has released a writing of top 28 tips on how to improve sex life that every couple should visit. The secrets revealed in this article are very valuable for your relationship, which may break in a near future time if you do not have a proper solution to maintain and beautify it.
Tips On How To Improve Sex Life For Men & Women
How to improve sex life for parents is a big question for almost of the couples after they get married and have kids. In this writing, you may come across some familiar ideas but really effective to freshen your love life. Try to apply the following methods; your sex life will be more dreamy and exciting.
1. Talk With Your Partner
Talking about sex is one of the most difficulties that many couples are finding out. Meanwhile, talking is a key to express the feelings, wishes, and the problems about sex. Having a good communication is the best solution to resolve sex issues and improve your sex life and your relationship. Talking regularly about sex will help you identify that sex is an essential part of the marriage and you cannot live happily together if sex life is boring or dead as the time passes. However, this is a big problem for some couples because they are shy or embarrassed about the subject. In this case, you should write down, chat through the computer, or turn on the lights by talking with your partner in the dark. Of course, you do not need to talk about sex at the beginning of the conversation if you are a shy person, just a talk about your children, some special events, parties, etc. In these talks, you can change or focus on the sex secretly. You must be ready for this decision if you do not want it to get worse.
- Talk about your wishes or hopes in sex life. No one can forbid your ambition in life and you may talk about your imaginative things about sex with your partner. Figure out what you want from your husband or your wife to have a better sex life. Assuredly, you will get the result if you do have effort in this. You may need help of some tools such as videos, magazines, books, or Internet. Telling your ideas is one of the most effectual tips how to improve sex life quickly.
- If you have a list of most-wanted things, your partner also needs to have a list of the most preferable things for cool sex life. You need to have the same question as he or she asks you before, write down and let give you the answer. Importantly, both of you have to be serious in this issue and talk openly with each other. By the way, you will understand more about your partner and get how to improve your love by your way.
2. Choose The Right Time
As written above, talking cannot be ignored if you want to improve sex life. But talking about sex is not casual. You cannot talk about this sensitive affair at any time at any place. Choose the right time to talk with your partner such as the bed time or the private time in somewhere. Certainly, you cannot talk about lovemaking when some sexual problems are not answered.
When talking about sex, try to send the specific messages to your partner. Focus on the most desirable things you will do with your lover in an appropriate time.
3. Talk About Fantastic Things
Talk about the fantastic things that you will perform to make your love more romantic and more beautiful. When reading paper or watching TV, you can ask your partner about his or her opinions about the subjects. You can talk honestly with your partner that you want this or you hope that. Talking fantastic things is like talking about your nice dream, which can come true in the future. You have the right to dream in your life and talking about the extravagant things is not an exception. Try to apply this technique, you will improve sex life dramatically, as well as make your sex life funny, fresh, and more spontaneous. Simply, you may talk about a romantic date or a beautiful landscape you wish to travel. You totally can focus on the crazy ideas to renew your love.
4. Talk During Making Love
Many people think that making love is a time that you just “make love” only. You are silent during sex and it is a mistake that many couples make time to time. The result is their relationships and sex life becomes colorless. Right touches during sex life will make both of you more excited. You can ask your partner some questions such as “do you like it”, “is that good”? If you do not know how to say, you can show your partner the parts to touch. Actually, your partner cannot guess your thoughts or your wish during sex, so you have to talk about that before or during sex. This is also a good way to encourage your partner “work” better and improve your sex life significantly.
5. Do Not Criticize
Try to avoid criticizing your partner about the sex ability. You may use the sentence “ I would like…” to talk about your desire. Negative focuses will not bring the benefits for your relationship; on the contrary, it will make your love more terrible. So, be polite and secret when talking about this issue. But it does not mean that you do not say about the mistakes, be honest when saying to the sex problem because you may hurt your wife or your husband if the sentence is too direct.
6. Try Something New
One of the most factors that damage your love is the old things you follow every day. Why don’t you try the new things in your bedroom? Well, I think that is not difficult to change your sex life from the bed. For example, you can last longer the love making or you can do something new in the bedroom such as:
- Redecorate the bedroom. Throw away the unnecessary on your bedroom and add something romantic and pretty in your bedroom. You can hang a nice picture on the wall or use some favorite images on the desk. Remember that your bedroom should not include the mundane things like junk furniture, toys of kids, laundry tools, etc.
- Take advantage the free day when your children and the baby sister are not at home and taste a good dinner with your favorite healthy recipes at home with candle, wine, and champagne.
- Go slowly when making love. The longer you are in bed with your partner, the happier you will be. Do not worry when sex.
- If you have never kissed or cuddled when sex, it is the time for you do this action, which will maintain good emotion when making love.
- You may get a new wind for your love life by trying to sex in hotel or some new places you have never tried before even though you have a house.
7. Initiate Sex
For many people, this is a brand new action to improve sex life. If you are always passive and shy when having sex, try to initiate sex with your partner. This is a surprising thing to your partner. This tip may be suitable to almost of the women because they are usually in the second to talk about sex. Normally, men initiate sex with your partner. If you want to change your love positively, this is one of the best ways for you to apply tonight. Leading love life is not an embarrassed thing but it is a perfect spicy for your sex relationship.
8. Concern Sexual Dysfunctions
Sexual dysfunctions are actual elements that contribute to destroy your sex life. You or your partner totally may suffer from some sex problems that can affect to your sex life. Many people keep secrets about the problem to their partner, as the result, they lose the satisfaction whenever having sex. This is not a good way to behave with your lover because they also have to get the bad influences from you. Plenty of men get premature ejaculation and they treat by themselves without talking to their wife. For women, they also get some common problems such as orgasm difficulty, vaginal dryness when making love, etc. If both of you are honest in this issues, you will have a romantic sex life as you wish as the sexual problems are thrown away. When the sex problems stay away, both of you will get gratified during sex.
9. Use Lubrication And Vibrator
Using lubrication is also an excellent way to improve sex life when you are not young enough or you get some health problems. Lubrication will make your sex more smooth, and will last longer the erection of a man. To improve your sex life, in some cases, you need the support from the safe supplements. Gels and liquid from lubrication will support your dry vaginal, which can make you painful performing sex. If your problem does not work for you, talk with your medical provider to have the best advice. Moreover, you may use vibrator as a device to discover more about the sexual response and shows the partner how she likes during sex.
10. Confess With Your Partner
If you always feel dry when having sex with light on, talk this problem with your partner. Confiding with him is an intelligent way for solving the problem. Likewise, if you cannot get erection, just talk with your wife and she will have you get it by changing something. In the case you are not interested in doing something crazy or inconvenient, you should confess with your lover and try to find the most proper solution.
11. Train Yourself
There are many resources or available materials on the Internet or bookstore you can get to learn. Taking advantages of the plentiful resources, you will educate about sex by yourself. By this way, you will know how to improve sex life with ease. For instance, you will learn how to touch, how to kiss more effectively when loving your partner, how to get rid of anxious feelings, etc. In reality, you can learn some helpful exercises from videos or books to touch your partner more perfectly. Sex is a sensory subject and you can educate yourself through the materials, if necessary, you may get consultation from specialists in case you cannot clear it up.
It is impossible to have a desirable sex if you are stressed. Relaxation will restore your energy, build strength, develop your mind, and turn on sex ability. Besides, you should have enough time to prepare. It sounds funny but it is true. When your body changes as it is not young and beautiful, your body is not in shape as before, you need to have a time to think about it. The truth is that physical change is one of the biggest factors that limit your sex quality. A typical example is that you will get difficulty reaching orgasm. Try to have comfortable and quiet time together; you will regain the excited feelings in sex. If you have enough conditions, try to have a long vacation. If not, you may have a picnic or all day long in a short trip around the town.
13. Connect With Your Body
Try to think about the wonderful moments in your life. For instance, feel relaxed when you do yoga, feel gratified when you have a sexy and attractive body. If a woman has negative image, she will not feel good and cannot connect her body well. Therefore, try to do the things that make you feel comfortable such as going to massage, playing with kids, or wearing a favorite dress, etc.
14. Improve Your Shape
Women are always proud of their body if they have a good shape. That is real. But they will be shy if their body does not look sexy and strong. Especially, women will hate themselves if they get a too fat or too thin body. If you are suffering an overweight body, let try to lose weight naturally such as doing regular exercises, following a proper diet plan. Or if you are too thin, let gain weight instantly with the healthy foods in your daily meals. Almost of the women are afraid of getting fat in thighs, waists, belly, and arms. By improving your confidence, you should come to the physical exercise and eat health as much as possible. You may ask your partner about types of shape he likes.
15. Restore Energy
After years of living together, both of you will feel tiresome with sex. That is the reason why many couples find a new partner or new relationship. How can you pass this problem and improve sex life? There are several adequate activities you can try to restore energy and recharge your love life.
- Leave your house: lean on your work, plan, and kids, you should have a special date outside house. Pick a place that you have never been there and have a recipe that both of you have never tasted. Wearing a sexy dress, making up lightly (if you rarely do this), you will feel aroused with this surprised plan.
- Try new positions: changing sexual positions is an effectual way to improve sex life. If the man has premature ejaculation, he should be in the passive position, underneath the woman’s body. Another sex position that you should try is the G-spot type, which will help the woman come orgasm.
- What do you do in vacation? Staying at home, watching TV, cooking and visiting to the relatives? Vacations are good chances for you to recharge your sex drive. Take a chance to live privately together, at least in the free time without burden work, stress or anxiety. If you do not have enough budgets to travel far from home, take advantage of the garden and the favorite places in your home town along with the tasteful dishes you prepared previously.
- To regain your sex feelings, you do not need to do the luxury or the extraordinary activities, but through the simple actions. Entering the bedroom, try to throw out works, reminders, problems, or some awful issues in a day. Thinking of the other subjects when having sex is a common mistake that many couples have, in particular, women usually get this bad thought.
- Sex, actually, reveals the current experience, so you should not think about the past but the present only.
- Both of you may challenge new activities outside your house such as white water rafting, rock climbing, etc. By the meaningful way, you will feel your relationship like the beginning one. This is a good time for you to restore your energy after long hard working days.
16. Leave Off Sex
Probably, you are lazy in beds for a long time living with your partner. It does not mean that your partner is not good, but sex is like a routine and you are not interested in this activity. Both of you may learn about the sex sensuality. Getting undressed, diming the light, and teasing your partner are the excellent ways to renew your sex life as it is not like the normal things you do in every sex drive. Sometimes, you are in bed but do not need to have sex, just teasing and doing something stupid is also a good way to make new for your relationship.
17. Turn On Message
Men usually want their partner to say what they feel when having sex. They expect the good feelings from their woman. But the problem many women suffer from is that they have nothing to say with their husband. Telling him how to turn you on is the best way to enter the sexual performance easily and wonderfully. Sometimes, he does not know how to touch to make you feel excited, so bring the good moments for both of you by talking with what you hope from his hands. Foreplay is an important part that most couples cannot ignore when making love. This will avoid dryness from woman and you will have a great sex performance with your own touches. There is no form of the foreplay for all men and women, but your partner, the woman will tell you how to do.
In reality, losing connection with your partner will make your relationship suffer from the break. If both of you feel close together, spend significant time together, you will not get any trouble with sex. Why don’t you kiss her lightly first and thank her for all? Why don’t you hug her from behind to make surprise? Why don’t you thank him for loving you? Giving some gratitude, you will see the instant results. For some people, those sentences seem to be trite and hollow, but they are the daily message you should send every day.
18. Do Exercises
Doing physical activity is one of the best ways to improve sex life quickly. You will improve your health including the brain development and body enhancement. Regular exercises will stimulate your cardiovascular, blood circulation, and sex ability. Following exercises also helps you reduce stress and improve your confidence well. Swimming, walking, cycling, dancing, yoga, etc are the perfect and easy exercises you should try to follow. Kegel is probably the best choice if you want to develop your sexual relation. By doing Kegel, you will improve your pelvic muscles, tighten your muscles, and last the sex life longer. It is very simple to implement at anywhere. To start this exercise, you should keep your muscle tight, stop the urine line, hold it for 2-3 seconds, and release the performance. You totally can do this exercise when drive, sit at the desk, stand up, or do housework, etc. For women, they may take effectiveness of vaginal weights to add up muscle.
19. Do Not Quit
Improving sex life is a long process and it is difficult if you do not have the effort to achieve it. You will not get any result if you do not give a try and hope in this plan. If you feel discomfort when making love, your doctor may diagnose the problem and give you the best treatments. Getting a better sex life, you need to work. You should give an expectation in what you are doing for your love life. Attempt to do the new ways to renew your sex life. I am sure that you will get lots of unbelievable outcomes from those activities. For many reasons, you may failure but do not give it up. Continue until both of you regain happiness in sex performance.
20. Limit Alcohol
Alcohol is a big element that contributes to battle your sex drive. Actually, drinking alcohol in limited amount can help men relax, but heavy alcohol drinking will cause the sexual problems worse. Drinking big alcohol amount in a long time will harm your liver. For women, alcohol will trigger the sleeplessness. Both of men and women should not drink much of alcohol as they want to recover sex quality.
21. Give Up Smoking
Like alcohol, smoking is one of the factors that cause health problems including poor sex performance. Smoking will lead to vascular-related diseases, which limit blood flow to your penis and tissues of vaginal. Additionally, female smokers will get menopause earlier than the normal period. If you get difficulty to quit smoking, try to chew gum or ask the doctor the common way to give up smoking effectively.
22. Eat Healthy Foods
Along with the lifestyle changes, regular exercises, healthy foods also commit to support your sex life. If you seriously want to improve sex life naturally, eating fat-lower foods will be the perfect option because fatty foods will increase obesity, blood cholesterol, and vascular conditions. Losing extra pounds helps you have a good shape.
Masturbation is not a dirty term anymore. In reality, masturbating is an effective way to help you improve vagina health. Especially, when you get menopause, vaginal will lack of the elasticity, so masturbation is the best choice to recover the function of vaginal. Besides, you can use dildo or vibrator. For men, if they cannot reach erection in a long time, they may get large amounts of oxygen in blood to keep a good sexual function in penis. Therefore, finding some helpful exercises to increase the blood flow to your penis is a good tip to improve sex life.
24. Try Challenge
Trying a new challenge is a prominent way to improve sex life. Have you ever tried to sex on the living room or in the kitchen? Have you ever tried to sex outside the bedroom? Or simply tried to watch some X movies or say some naughty words to make your sex performance more colorful. In order to enhance your sex life, you must be
- Sensual: making love with a bit surprise for your partner. Have some flowers in the room, use candlelight, prepare juicy fruit, wear some perfume, turn on jazz music, or wear an extremely sexy dress are some examples you may learn to magnify your sex life.
- Playful: telling some funny stories or finding the warm feeling when both of you take a bubble bath and play some games in the bedroom.
- Creative: sex is not on the calendar, you do not need to set a specific time to have sex, instead of making love on Sunday night, you should sex in the Sunday morning. Try to experience new activities and new positions, use lingerie, sex toys, watch movie, or say some different words with your partner. Let try to spice your sex life by doing in the break from work, from the unexpected time, unexpected places, and with your own ways. Have you ever tried oral sex? Try it sometimes but make sure that both of you are fresh before making love.
- Romantic: do you remember the love time before you get married? So romantic, right? So why don’t you repeat the action when you want to improve sex life? Read poetry, have a gift and flowers for your woman even though it is not a special event, initiate sex, prepare a good dinner, or be sexier than before. In general, the romance in love must be reappeared because they will support your love life much more than you think. Plan a special date and show the special care to you lover, I beg that both of you will get fun and renew your love after that. Just a simple text send to your partner, the result is unbelievable when she feel like the first time she meets you.
- Urgent: have time to prepare and recharge your love is necessary, but you may try to love urgently. It is a good spicy when you can take s short shower, try to sex in a break, sex after works, or make love immediately after a date. Both of you may pretend to be strange and reintroduce about yourself, pretend you do not know about the partner, pretend you do not know about sex, or pretend to touch him by playing your hair, and so on. Love will be more beautiful from these stupid activities.
- Kinky: if sex is boring, why don’t you be kinky to it? It means that you have the right to be kinky with sex without judgment or fear from your partner.
25. Teasing Time
Dirty texts or dirty talks are uncommon ways to use with almost of the couples. But this is one of the best ways to improve sex life after a long period to live together. Send your partner a dirty text during the working time, describe what you like to do, make eye contact when go with him, or whisper with the lover though there are many people around you. Let have sex if you have a chance to implement. Certainly, your partner will be not familiar with this action, but it is a big surprise you may bring to her.
26. Sex More Often
Practice more often will make a perfect love. The more time to sex, the more love you will receive. Do not say “no” with sex when your partner ask you or send the message, say “yes” is one of the simplest ways to get more sex times with him. Be kinky to sex does not mean that you should deny the request all the time. But you do not concentrate on the quantity of sex performance and forget the sex quality, which is more important than the time you sex. If you always say “I love you” before marriage, this romantic sentence should be repeated every day to recharge your sex battery.
27. Be On The Same Ground
It is difficult to change your sex life positively if you stand in different ground. Both of you have the same responsibility to build your home and take care of your children. You cannot get a dream sex if your woman stays late at night to care the kids. Try to focus before you decide any decision and avoid arguing as much as possible. This is one of the best methods to improve sex life that almost of the couples cannot manage.
Review your past life through the wedding album, memory, and souvenir. Remember time of love from friend time to the love time. Try to take couple photos as you have tendency to take images for family and kids. In the past, you usually celebrate special anniversary for your partner, why do you forget those days after marriage? Birthday, wedding ceremony, loving anniversary, etc. are the memorial days you should not forget to improve sex life.
Learn more: How To Stay Happy In A Relationship For Couples
To see all of our tips and tricks, go to our main Sexual Health page.
After reading my writing of 28 tips how to improve sex life, I hope that you will get the most useful secrets to renew your love. You should try to follow and see how your love changes positively. If you have any question, please leave it below and I will respond to you soon.