How To Stop Arguing In A Relationship – 15 Useful Tips

how to stop arguing in a relationship

Remember the last time has an argument with your partner, was it frustrating? Was it painful? Was this argument necessary? What can you do to deal with argument and quarrel without ruining your relationships?

Relationships with your boyfriend or girlfriend can be the most rewarding aspects of your life. You hold a special position for that person with whom you have shared moments of joy. Differences in personality are inevitable. What makes you unique as an individual can result in conflicts and disagreements during your relationship.

When disagreements are not understood properly and emotionally, some trivial exchanges will stir into a full-on battle and maybe end what you have spent months and years to build up.

How to save it without regret? Read this article of tips on how to stop arguing in a relationship on VKool site to build your great relationship.

How To Stop Arguing In A Relationship

1. Use Your Ears, Not Your Mouth

use your ears, not your mouth download

Every time you and your partner have a quarrel, you both have to use mouth to raise your argument. If both of you talk and no one listens to each other, the discussion won’t stop.

Instead of trying to become a louder speaker, why don’t you listen to your partner first? As all words released when you are angry can hurt your partner and make your quarrel more serious.

Read: How to read female body language attraction & facial expressions

2. Go To Bed

go to bed

Going to bed is not a sign of a failure. It’s actually a way to stop arguing and avoid worse conflicts. Just keep calm to be yourself first. This is also a time for your partner to have his or her clear thought. Take some rest. Do not let negative wander in your mind. Relax your mind totally. Wait to the next day and talk to your partner. I’m sure that everything will be easily for you to deal with.

Read more: How to relax your mind and body from anxiety and stress fast

3. Shut Up And Touch

shut up and touch

Next to simple yet effective tips on how to stop arguing in a relationship, be careful with your words. Everything hurtful can come from your mouth. So think twice before speaking words out. And when the argument is on the top, you should not make it continue as an active volcano. Shut up.

Moreover, touch can be very useful to stop your argument fast. A touch as a medication for the drug addicted.

Recommended: 10 most common marriage problems and solutions

4. Stop Trying To Become The Winner

stop trying to become the winner download

Different in a war, there will be absolutely a winner, there is no winner when a relationship is broken. So, don try to be a winner in a quarrel. Though you are right, you should say sorry or do something like this to stop your argument. Then, your partner will figure out the right things and it will not be important to find out who was right and who was wrong any more.

5. Remember You Are A Couple

remember you are a couple download

Yes! You are a couple. Both of you built up this relationship. Only one person cannot make a quarrel. Though you are angry or feel disappointed, remember to keep your partner’s face. Don’t blame, don’t hurt and make your partner lose his or her face. Because you are a couple, so think about your responsibility to keep it, save it, instead of splitting up you and your partner.

See: How to talk to women: tips and advice for men

6. Find The Humor

find the humor

When it comes to ways on how to stop arguing in a relationship, pay attention to having the sense of humor. An argument comes naturally when you get angry. But if you have a sense of humor, this sense may make your partner forget a serious argument and everything will be more comfortable. At that time, take time to say sweet words and heal your love. It’s not hard to do that. Just don’t try to be too serious. In fact, your argument is a step to help you both understand each other more. Then, your relationship will be stronger.

Read: Make women laugh

7. Do Not Make It Personal

do not make it personal download

Don’t try to show your strong personality as this is a way you keep your partner far from you. When you are selfish, you just think about yourself or you just think in your own way, your ego will bigger than your relationship.

Your partner will feel strange and small in this relationship. He or she won’t find more common things between both of you. This is not really good for a healthy relationship. To stop an argument, you need to put you and your partner equal. When you talk about your side, you then should talk about him. This is also a way you respect your partner and make the quarrel stop fast.

8. Remember What Is Important

remember what is important download

Right! Conflicts and argument may be a simple thing that happens for couples. But many quarrels that end in bad ways can ruin your relationship. If you want to maintain your relationship and go further, you should be aware of what is important to stop a toxic argument fast.

Figure out why you and your partner start an argument; whether the end of the argument can help you and your partner solve the problem and find the common points.

Especially, when you and your partner decided to go to a marriage, you both can have some arguments to understand each other more. However, if an argument is nonsense, stop it and try to change your emotion and topic.

Read on: How to get out of an unhealthy relationship fast

9. Use “XYZ” Statements

use “xyz” statements

I mean a structure for a couple to run an argument to a normal talk. For instance, you can say: When I did X in the situation Y, I felt Z. Your honest will make your partner calm down and think about it clearly. Just feel free to talk about right things coming from your mind. If your partner listen to your story and understand the things, your quarrel will end soon. Don’t worry, it’s just the way to talk to your partner and give yourself a change to explain and express yourself.

10. Keep Calm & Polite

keep calm & polite

When it comes to an important rule in love, keep calm and polite. Though you or your partner is wrong, you need to be awake to solve the situation. Get clear that the aim of argument is to find out the truth, find the common point and solution. If you are trying to raise your voice, blame your partner or dame him or her, it’s just the way you are ending your relationship or ruin it very fast.

11. Be Clear & Direct

be clear & direct

Next to how to stop arguing in a relationship tips, be straight. Avoid sending unambiguous messages and avoid potential misinterpretation. If you are not clear, your partner will have more doubt about you and this makes your argument become worse.

Though you are wrong, directly confess your mistake. If you can show your honest, your partner will forgive you and everything will be ok again.

12. Avoid Criticism & Sarcasm

avoid criticism & sarcasm download

Sometimes the criticism can work to solve a problem, yet sarcasm and criticism often may not help couples make up. So try to show your concern as a complaint rather than a criticism.

Also, avoid being defensive. If you feel criticized, it will be natural to respond with defensiveness. Instead of being defensive, come up with a clarification question. This way may help your partner be heard rather than getting criticism. 

13. Validate


Next to tips on how to stop arguing in a relationship, don’t running away. Validate your partner. Stay there with your commitment though you have no mistake. Stay there with your partner. Do not go silent, do not run out. Distance is a sign showing that you are not trying to fix the argument. It is said that “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger”, so stay until your problem can be resolved in peace. 

14. Fight Fair

fight fair

Don’t be childlike. Do something fair in an argument. Respect your partner and respect the rule of a fight. Let your partner stop talking and you start in turn. During a conflict or quarrel, use your caring words, show your appreciating and avoid the put-down. Make sure that even in a frustration or an anger, your speech and words are not a cause of further inflammation.

15. Brake Your Argument

brake your argument

Take control of your conflict. Just imagine that you are driving your car fast and you have to brake to drive slower or stop it. Same to that, you need to brake your argument in some ways. Keep calm. Let your partner talk first. Let him or her get rid of anger, then you explain your situation. Do something for your partner to make him or her understand that you are trying to help your partner or you are trying to make your partner forget the bad things.

I’ve shown you the top 15 tips on how to stop arguing in a relationship. Hope that you can make use of all these tips to get rid of worse situation and keep your relationship well. For any feedback about this article on how to stop arguing in a relationship, please comment on it below!

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